Bagism: Library

Skywriting -- Apr 05, 1998
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Continued from Apr 04, 1998

But just then they heard a huge bang, and then a scream coming from the direction of the room where Paul and Linda had been sticking glass stir rods up their noses...

they ran to see where that bang came from and it was....

Ringo! Slamming on his new old-fashioned drumkit. He had snuck up on Paul and Linda, and began playing the drums with two of John's cocktail stirrers. Linda, startled, let out a wild yelp. John barges in and sees Ringo banging on his cymbals with John's two favorite antique glass cocktail stirrers....

and screams. "AAGH! My cocktail stirrers!" John ran to Ringo and removed the antique cocktail stirrers from Ringo's hands, replacing them with straws that would make no noise. "Shurrup, all of you!" he hissed. "You'll wake Sean!" Just then Sean, age 3 at the time, comes toddling out from his bedroom. "Daddy? What was that?" "Never mind," John said, escorting Sean back to his bedroom. "Go back to sleep." Sean looked up at John. "Why does that man have things stuck up his nose?" John stifled a giggle. "He's pretending he's a walrus."

Yoko came home then. John and his buddies went out for a quick drink while Sean was having his nap. John, the driver, could not have any, but then this left the rest of them to do as they pleased. He had to drive them all home, and in Paul's case, he had to help Linda drag Paul's prone body into the house. He arrived home to find that Sean was just getting up. He fixed two bowls of sugar-free honey-sweetened ice cream for them and they sat in the living room joking with each other, a pair of life long friends.

Harry just watched, suddenly excluded. So he left. John turned his head when he heard the door creak on its hinges. It was a slow whine that took the place of anything that Harry could have said. Then he got hit by a streetcar.

Peeling himself up off the cement, Harry peeked through the window. God, that ice cream looked good. Harry's stomach rumbled. He HAD to get something to eat.

But when he arrived at the ice cream parlor, who would he meet but...

Syd Barret, chatting out loud with that Luiza over some chocolate ice cream. It seems they were talking about Instant Karma, a song that Barret just couldn't like. But that wasn't too important to Harry. Then he got hit by another streetcar.

and the madcap ( aka Barret ) laughed. Poor Harry, he saw red.

and then marianne faithfull and mick jagger walked into the icecream place and started going at eachother in front of everything. this made paul turn green, and he realized he needed some sex... fast...

But instead he got hit by.....yup, a streetcar.

"I took my brains out and stretched 'em on the rack, now I'm not too sure I'm ever gonna get 'em back," said Paul. "Are you crazy?" asked John as he ate a banana. "You'll see, Johnny boy. I'll make a hit record off those lines someday," giggled Paul as he ate an Oreo. "Bloody hell whatever," muttered John. "I'm going to get some nacho cheese at the market." And with that, John was gone. As John stepped onto the street, he saw a streetcar headed right for him. "All right, this is it. No more!" shouted John, determined not to let history repeat itself as it had so many times before. Then he got hit by a streetcar.

Continued on Apr 06, 1998

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