Bagism: Library

Skywriting -- Mar 05, 1998
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Continued from Mar 04, 1998

Meanwhile, little James McCartney had been left at home with his sisters, and was still very confused. "Stella?" he asked softly. "What happened to Daddy? Where'd he go?" Stella just looked tearfully at her younger brother and said nothing. James started to cry quietly, wanting desperately to understand why his Daddy had gone away and his Mummy was always hanging about with one of Daddy's old friends. "Please," he begged. "Please tell me where Daddy went! And why is Mummy always with that man?"

Stella hugged her younger brother protectively. "Shh," she soothed. "Don't worry about it, James. Everything's going to be just fine. Daddy..." She paused. She couldn't tell him the whole truth, could she? No, better to leave that to Mum. "Daddy's just gone away for a little while. Things'll be back to normal soon. Now come on, it's time for your nap."

James nodded agreeably and followed Stella into his room where she got him settled down. "Now you go to sleep," she said as she left. James couldn't sleep at first and for a while he just lay there, wondering where Daddy had gone and what he was doing. James hoped his daddy came back soon, he missed him.

When Linda got home later from her jaunt with John, she was greeted by an almost silent house. It was odd not hearing any music playing or having any televisions on. Downright creepy, when push came to shove. And despite the fact that she and John were together now, Linda missed Paul desperately. She missed hearing him hum little tunes as he did things around the house, missed watching him take care of the kids, just missed him being around. Swallowing hard, Linda wiped away the tear that had started down her cheek. But her grief was suddenly interrupted by the faint sound of crying, from down the hall.

Following the sound, Linda found her sun curled up on his bed, sobbing. Linda went to him and sat down on the edge of the bed. "Oh, what's wrong, James?" she asked softly, giving him a hug.

"I want my daddy!" James cried, pulling away. "Where's Daddy? Where did he go?" James took a choked breath. "And why are you with one of Daddy's friends all the time?" James started to cry softly again. "Daddy's gone away," he wept. "And he's not coming back, is he, Mummy?"

Linda felt a lump rise in her throat. "Oh, sweetie," she began, feeling horrible. "I... no, James. Daddy isn't coming back. He- he died, sweetheart."

James took a few moments to digest this piece of information, grasping just what it meant. "No!" he cried suddenly. "No, Daddy's not dead! He's not! I don't believe you..." James started to cry even harder than he was before.

I sat in my room wondering what was with all the street cars, and why the story was always so weird... I hoped nobody would drag me into it. Then I remembered I had put myself in it, only to be utterly ignored. Thank God. I was freaked out by it all... John with LINDA?!?!? Now THAT was weird... I got up to get a drink and was promtly hit by a street car. I screamed and ran after it, kicking the shit out of it... I hoped John would be proud. Then again, maybe I should just go home, take some dramamine and go to sleep. Nah. I couldn't anyways. "Uh-oh." I said. "NOW I'm in for it." I was in the middle of the story... I turned around and saw Linda with James and left the room as fast as I could. I went by a mirror and looked at myself. I looked like Stuart Sutcliffe. "Now THIS is fucked up." I said. I'm a girl. Or I'm supposed to be. Oh well, this IS fiction... I went to go find John, and maybe a way to get Paul back. And I needed to get George and Ringo out of Limbo-land.

I hate this place, George." Ringo said. "I hate it too." Said George. "Hey you guys." I said. "Let's go find a way to get Paul back from the dead." I said. "Who are you? And why do you look like Stu?" Asked George. "I don't know. This story has gotten weird, to weird to understand, and I somehow have wound up in the middle of it." "Oh, OK." Said George. "Anything to get out of this place." George and Ringo followed me.

"Hey Jude." said Paul. "My name's not Jude." Said John. "Hey, WAIT A FUCKING MINUTE!!!! I thought you were dead!!!" Screamed John. "Well, I'm not said Paul. They hugged each other and were promtly hit by a street car.

"I hate these damn street cars!!!!" Shrieked Yoko Ono, Who was suddenly alive again and mad at the street cars and John for running off with Linda. "I'll have to bash yer head in, John, for running off with me wife." Paul said. "JO-O-OHN!!!!!!!!!!!!!" Screamed Yoko. "HOW DARE YOU RUN OFF WITH HER!!!! I'M GONNA KILL YOU!!!!" Just then.... They were all hit by street cars.

John shrugged. The streetcars were bothering him less and less...Hell, given a few more pages, he might even grow tho respect the blasted things. "Well, everything's all right now...right?" John recieved no answer. "the only thing I can't seem to make out was how this whole thing started..." He tried to remember the last few mintues of his sanity. It was night, there was Yoko...

and then Paul had come up. he had bashed him on the head. then felt bad cuz he remembered that paul had a whole bunch of little brats at home. then linda had killed Yoko in a mad rage to get john back. then linda had hypnotized John into thinking he loved her until yoko came back and broke his trance... wait a minute! he looked over across the room where Paul was lying on a bed, with Linda rubbing his back. He had earphones in his ears. What on earth could he be listening to? John was hiding behind a big box, so neither Paul (who was asleep anyway) nor linda knew he was there...

Linda got up and at first hesitated to leave the room, looking at Paul with adoration, but finally moved towards the door, closing it behind her. This was his chance! John slyly came out from behind the box and crept over to where Paul was sleeping. He gingerly lifted the headphones out of Paul's ears, and put them on his own...

he was immediately stricken with the sound of Linda's voice, double tracked. loudly repeating "I LOVE LINDA, I LOVE LINDA, I LOVE LINDA. SHE IS BEAUTIFUL, SHE IS WONDERFUL, I LOVE HER. I WILL NOT BE UNFAITHFUL TO LINDA, I'D RATHER BE WITH LINDA THAN WITH MY MATES, LINDA IS MY LIFE...." Just hearing that, made something in John's head snap... a memory flash. he suddenly had a vision of himself in this room, hearing the same voice repeating the same things. When linda had thought Paul was dead... she was brainwashing them! "I've got to tell Paul!" john said to himself... but just at that moment...

He came back to his senses. "I should let the bugger suffer...especially after that he never meant it about me..." John shoved his hands in his pockets, sullenly.

John was about to go back behind the box and climb out the window, when he heard a bloodcurdling scream. A horrified little James McCartney barged into the room. Seeing John, he ran over to him and began pulling at his pant leg. "HELP ME! HELP ME! MUMMY'S DOING IT AGAIN! SHE'S SCARING ME! SHE'S...

Jumped on top of Daddy again!" "my god, poor child, being subjected to his parents crude sex life" John thought to himself. "it's ok little James. You're mommies just trying to deflate you're daddies big ego" John didn't want to wait to tell Paul About the brainwashing thingy, but he wasn't sue he could keep his food down if he went in there now!

Some group was walking down the street. "Didn't I tell you, Luiza? Soon all would come to what it was.". Luiza just sighed. "What's that, sis?". "That streetcar didn't make you no harm, did it?" . She laughed. "Of course that not. C'mon, let's get outa this story at once.". The little girl laughed a bit. "Can we come back one day?" , she said, getting into the streetcar. "Hmm...why? Why not?". The streetcar moved away till it disappeared on the horizon. Their next stop was just few miles away... "Anna, sis, there is one thing I forgot to ask." "What?" "Who was that Beatle Phanton?". Anna laughed. "It was a guy called Sutcliffe. Why?" . Luiza looked subdued. "Not wanting to scare you, but...the guy is just behind us!"

As the sun melted in the eye of the beholder, Symbolic elephants turned bright red... Oh, wait a minute! I'm in the wrong place! Sorry about that!!! I'll add to the story. I thought this was that Dada site I hang out in all the time... Sorry. Geroge and Ringo were in Limbo-land AGAIN, and were, quite frankly, tired of it. "I hate bein' 'ere!" Shouted George. "somebody get me and Ringo out of this place!!!" Just then, they weren't in Limbo-land any longer. They were being written about. "Ha-ha, We're saved!" Shouted George, as he and Ringo went off to find John and Paul. "I hope they write about us for a long, long time." Said Ringo, glad to be out of Limbo land. Just then, they were both hit by a street car. "That's the first time that's happened to us, George." Said Ringo. "Yeah, I know. I'm beginning to hate it."

Then they got hit by a train. What? You were expecting, maybe, oh, I don't know... A street car?

"Why do people do it, anyway?", Ringo asked. Luiza, who was going inside her house, turned to answer. "Well, I don't know. Maybe they are sadic. Or whatever. And I better be inside home if I don't want to end up hit too. And, oh yea, Ringo?" "Yes?" "Watch out. You are my fav. Beatle, and I wouldn't like to see you hurt." Anna called her sister to dinnner, and she entered inside her house.

The door closed quietly on Ringo, who started on his way back home. Suddenly he heard a piercing shriek. "Look out, Ringo!" Ringo turned around, and jumped back as a streetcar whizzed by. "Yeow!" On the back of the streetcar were a small group of laughing Liverpudlians, pointing at Ringo and laughing. One of them laughed so hard he peed his pants, which made the others laugh even harder. They looked strangely familiar. Who were these scruffs? "THEY'RE the Crap eaters!", yelled a voice on the plane in a car with a boat on a tree with a dog and a cat that eat pooh like me!

THey're always eating pooh but you know who to give it too. "Giveth and cometh to the new land", he shouted with the rythm of the band. "BUT don't you have questions about it's taste?" They listened none and pushed me along in haste. "We used to be like you wondering about", "what?... did you do stop and give up?", "stop the pondering and leave it to me",said the bishop. "I'll tell ya what to know just give your crap to me." (and maybe you'll get a drink a pee. 'I don't want that especially if it ain't from me."... I sat silently chained to a wall. This civilization is strange they just listen to the beatles and everything else is POOH.


"I can't take all this conformist crap eating", said john. "They've tricked innocent people into being crap eaters". Let's Go have a concert in protest!


John was just starting to really get groovin' to the music, when he felt a little hand on his arm. He turned around to see a little dark haired girl with big eyes. But the first thing he noticed was that they were all red and puffy. She had been crying. He thought he'd seen her somewhere before, and when she spoke, he immediately knew who she was. "I didn't know where else to go..." she began. Mary. Mary McCartney, poor child. "Mummy.. she's.. she's..." she couldn't say it. John was outraged. Not only did this put the responsibility on him to "do the right thing", but how irresponsible of damn Linda to screw her kids up like this and leave them for other people to take care of. This was the last straw. John picked up the terrified little girl and carried her back home. He got Yoko to put her to bed, and then marched over to the McCartney residence - to settle this once and for all....

when he arrived at the house.... they had a HUGE bed-in. they got stoned, laughed, and found some web site about them and, after reading this story, laughed so hard their sides hurt. john saw the little box that said "Add to Story" and he thought "what the hell? it's about ME, after all." so he wrote . . . they had a HUGE bed-in. they got stoned, laughed, and found some web site about them and, after reading this story, laughed so hard their sides hurt. john saw the little box that said "Add to Story" and he thought "what the hell? it's about ME, after all." so he wrote . . .

they had a HUGE bed-in. they got stoned, laughed, and found some web site about them and, after reading this story, laughed so hard their sides hurt. john saw the little box that said "Add to Story" and he thought "what the hell? it's about ME, after all." so he wrote . . . they had a HUGE bed-in. they got stoned, laughed, and found some web site about them and, after reading this story, laughed so hard their sides hurt. john saw the little box that said "Add to Story" and he thought "what the hell? it's about ME, after all." so he wrote . . .

George was back in Limbo-land, but not for long. I was writing about him, so he was out. "I'd better go find someone who's a main character in this story so I don't have to go back to Limbo-land." He ran as fast as he could to John's haus.

But when he got there, no one was home. Then he remembered that the party was at Paul and Linda's! DUH! George hit himself on the forehead and ran over to Cavendish Avenue where he found...

A huge orgy! "Hey, I wanna be in it too!" He said. "C'mon and join us then, Georgie!!!" Shouted John over the noise. George did. Just then...

They were all hit by streetcars!!!!

Continued on Mar 06, 1998

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